Here for Hacks?! Now of course the Krush can't be broadcasting The Adventures of Grandmaster Hack on the Wheels of Steel on out to the whole information infobahn that is the World Wide Web. I mean, get real!
So instead of delving into the covert art of net ninjutsu or the web wizards behind it, here on the Orange Krush Homepage we're going to talk about the killer quadrennial party I host with TERMINAL VELOCITY for the information super highway's most elite and flavorific net jockies and code crackers on this hyperlink expressway... the WIPEOUT CYBERDELIA!
This high-tech Hacktivismo Hackstock, a righteous assemblage of the hottest personas and personalities on the Net today! Inspired by the super sah-weet Cyberdelia nightclub in the movie HACKERS - you know the one - the banging techno, the quarter-pipe roll-in for rollerbladers, the wall of CRT monitors, the deconstructed robots, and the the gigantic videogame screen playing WIPEOUT! (check out the hackerscurator.com for more on the film's fashions, locations, crew, and tech)! Just like in the flick, the KRUSH / VELOCITY WIPEOUT CYBERDELIA is a place of elite hacker unification, a joining together for web-centric and flavorful Netizens and Phreaks for a night of cyber-age revelry.
Featuring a wall-sized 10-foot Wraithveil Rear Projection Screen - WIPEOUT and WIPEOUT XL running on OG Playstation hardware (and WIPEOUT OMEGA on PS4) projected with 3200 Lumens LED optical projector.
Here's some details for those of you who missed 'em. You've got another quadrennial to get your hardware up to class and your rep up to spec for the next one!
WIPEOUT2017
The debut of the WIPEOUT CYBERDELIA came right in the midst of a year of violent protests, frat bros in rompers, election interference from foreign powers, Unicorn Frappuccinos, the #MeToo Movement, platform Crocs, and totally insane ballistic missile posturing with North Korea.
What this year needed was a perfect distraction. And so this legendary meeting was born!
Aside from dope tunes and a wall-sized 10-foot Wraithveil Rear Projection Screen to play WIPEOUT, WIPEOUT XL and WIPEOUT OMEGA on this event also feature three original Wipeout-themed reaction-time-improving Think Drink / Smart Drink cocktails, Electro-Bolt, Missile, and a non-alcoholic Shield all created by hacker supreme and mixologist TERMINAL VELOCITY for this party.
This event's flyer, like flyers for all the best '90s raves, has almost no useful information on it whatsoever and is mostly unreadable thanks to DR★'s super dope Wipeout typefaces. Hackers do it in the dark, home slice!
In order to attend this event guests were required to get details by physically placing a long-distance phone call to the Krush's temporary burner answering machine at the (641) area code in Central Ohio. The info on that answering machine was only available for two weeks. For those elite hackers who had missed the answering machine details, we launched a last-minute bootleg-GeoCities containing Cyberdellia 2017 details. Here's a screenshot:
HACKER ROLL CALL
Your Hosts:
ORANGE KRUSH
TERMINAL VELOCITY
Hacker Roll Call:
CHAIN WHIPLASH
DOT MATRIX
DANGER ZERO
NEON666
PHREAKAZOID
BUTTERFLY
THE CLEANER
MARV
FIRESTARTER
SEXY NURSE
ZERO
VIX
Peep these photos from the event... but keep 'em downlow!
WIPEOUT2021
Four years later the WIPEOUT CYBERDELIA returned! Yo, that's just what you do for a quadrennial party!
A true cyberpunk time to be alive, twenty twenty one, a science fiction year for sure. Orange skies, four million dead and counting, stir-crazy people balancing on stacks of milk crates, Boston's famous 10-feet-wide house sells for a ridiculous $1.25 million, domestic terrorists staging a violent coup at the US Capitol, Bernie and his mittens, gasoline hoarders filling up trashbags.
To ensure safety during an exacting time, this event was invite-only and only for the hackers who used that burner answering machine four years earlier and who either attended the first event, or had attempted to be at the inaugural assemblage. Clearly, only the elitest of the elite net jockies!
The wall-sized 10-foot Wraithveil Rear Projection Screen returned (uh... no doi!) and another three original Wipeout-themed reaction-time-improving Think Drink / Smart Drink cocktails c/o hacker supreme and mixologist TERMINAL VELOCITY. Rockets, Mines, and a non-alcoholic Auto Pilot Engaged created specifically for this party. And WIPEOUT, WIPEOUT XL and WIPEOUT OMEGA on the best of original and modern hardwares.
HACKER ROLL CALL
Your Hosts:
ORANGE KRUSH
TERMINAL VELOCITY
Hacker Roll Call:
CHAIN WHIPLASH
DOT MATRIX
DANGER ZERO
NEON666
GATECRASHER
PHREAKAZOID
BUTTERFLY
THE CLEANER
SEXY NURSE
SPICY GINGER
ZERO
VIX
LIME SHOCK
2K&JUAN
Here are fresh high-cyber-fashion photos from the event and also the duo of top secret invites, hacked directly into attendees email accounts, and complete with a little bit of SFW house-made ASCII porn...
HARDWARE_CONFIG
Probing CPU...
CPU Type: P6 Intel (TM) x86 Microprocessor
CPU Clock Rate: 233 MHz
FSB Speed: 66 MHz
Base Memory Size: 120 MB
Floppy config. Drive A: 1.4 MB (3.5 inch)
Modem config: 28.8 BPS
PC817417: Found
COM1 at Port Address: 3F8 is enabled
Enslave CPU + Run: Hack_The_Planet
Enable: wipE’out” 2021
If configuration is correct press ENTER
or CTRL+BREAK to quit
ENTER
Loading...
Yo yo, my fellow Netizens and Phreaks! You have proven to be Elite so you’re getting this invitation to bring your fleshmeat to the FLESHMEET.
In honor of the historic 20th anniversary of Isotope, the counter culture underground’s club of clubs, we’re opening up the Cyberdelia Arcade butterzone once again with the hackers’ choicest of softworks run on the world’s fastest OG hardware. WIPEOUT, WIPEOUT XL and WIPEOUT OMEGA on a 10-foot Wraithveil Rear Projection Screen projected with the power of a 3200 Lumens Light-Emitting Diode Projector. This is the e-invite you’ve been waiting for!
Isotope 20th Anniversary
Cyberdelia Arcade Fleshmeet
Saturday, June 19th. 7pm.
Isotope. San Francisco
Your Hosts:
ORANGE KRUSH
TERMINAL VELOCITY
Hacker Roll Call:
CHAIN WHIPLASH
DOT MATRIX
DANGER ZERO
NEON666
GATECRASHER
PHREAKAZOID
BUTTERFLY
THE CLEANER
SEXY NURSE
SPICY GINGER
ZERO
VIX
LIME SHOCK
2K&JUAN
To reduce the dangers of 2021 malware this Fleshmeet is for known Phreaks and Netizens only, of the Full-Vax, Mask-Centric set. Life is RISC, keep it off the BBSes and IRCs.
Check it - We’re not talking about your mom’s Avon party here! This is the fleshmeet for the most elite CPU booters on the net, so leave normie threads to the trashfile, it’s time to sport your tastiest ravetastic cyberpunk gears.
This e-mail is programmed to self-delete in 32 seconds and run our custom whitehat script that will log your computer into the backdoor of our favorite superuser account to peep the party password...
Orange Krush & Terminal Velocity
KRUSH / VELOCITY
Enslave CPU + Run: Elite_Hack
Logging On...
PC0000000: Found
Probing CPU...
CPU Type: Gibson (TM) x99 Supercomputer
Connect To: 1995_Backdoor
Run: SUPERUSER_PASSWORD_CRACK
ENTER
Password: WIPEOUT2021
sechscowboy.ASCII
Click ENTER to download.
ENTER
ERROR: DOWNLOAD INTERRUPTED.
loading… running CPU piggyback…
ARPING 192.168.42.1
60 bytes from 00:60:97:34:91:55
3 packets received. 3 packets transmitted.
Enslave CPU + RUN: fleshmeet_update_2.0
…
Yo yo, my Phreaks! This is hacker elite ORANGE KRUSH, comin’ atcha Ctrl Plus L+A+R+G+E and full Cmd + Bee B+O+L+D! Much apologies for cracking into your terminals again for this fleshmeet update from myself and TERMINAL VELOCITY. Please do hard-wire this info into your cerebellum Read-Only-Memory for us…
Fresh in the Flesh!
Listen up, no one wants to see the clothes your mom bought you for school. This is a party for the most elite hackers on the Net! So plan to sport your freshest individual ‘95 urban streetwear styles that compliment your strong Netizen personalities. No Wackintosh!
Talk to the Hand!
CRUCIAL: We’re living in a panic era of real world pandemic, and a number of our fellow Netizens at this Fleshmeet might not have spent as much time offline as you have - so keep it cool & let’s not make it weird for each other. Stay aware of giving your fellow hackers whatever personal space they might need right now. Don’t forget to bring a mask, bonus points for stylishness. ABSOLUTELY NO HUGS OR ELBOW BUMPS UNLESS MUTUALLY CONSENSUAL.
Hackers of the World Unite!
The KRUSH / VELOCITY WIPEOUT CYBERDELIA is a place of elite hacker unification, a joining together for web-centric and flavorful Netizens and Phreaks for a night of cyber-age revelry, activate your in-flesh love for your fellow wizards of the web and turn on your Higher Brain Functions in this mutual meeting of the minds. We're all in this virtual dungeon together, and we all know you don't split the party in the dungeon!
Boombastical Boooz!
That hottest software samurai, the smooth circuit surfer of the netiverse, TERMINAL VELOCITY, will be serving up a duo of her best cyberpunk wipE’out” themed Think Drink / Smart Drink cocktails (and one non-alcoholic bevvy) for your reaction-time-improving pleasure. So be sure to pack a spare liver in your fanny pack!
Deets!
You already know the place to be, the underground’s club of clubs, but here’s your refresher:
Isotope 20th Anniversary
Cyberdelia Arcade Fleshmeet
Saturday, June 19th. 7pm.
Isotope. San Francisco
Invite only. No tagalongs. And no one in the door without a nom de Phreak.
See you then, fellow phoneline jockies of the web!
We now return you to your regularly scheduled netsurf. After a quick reboot to clear your cache, that is…
Boo-ya!
Orange Krush & Terminal Velocity
KRUSH / VELOCITY
—-
SIGNAL LOST.
Rebooting…